Smokes and Twinkletoes walk into an (apparently) abandoned warehouse after taking out the guards outside. Failing their perception checks, they don't notice the guy behind them. This guy puts a gun to Smoke's back.

GM (as guy): "Don't move. I'll shoot."
Smokes: "Get that gun off me! I'm going to give you 5 seconds or else you're getting a death touch. 5.... 4.... 3..."

*The guy pulls the gun, Smokes takes a severe wound*
GM (as guy): "Told you... what does dying get you?"


Somehow.... Smokes lived.

About 15 minutes into your walk, Twinkletoes gives you a call just as he gets home from work.

Smokes: "Smokes. Is this the toes of the twink?"

Twinkletoes: "Come on... that was one time! I was drunk! Can't you give a man a break for being drunk?"

Smokes: "Nuh-uh, not until you stop telling people about the time I sat on you."

Twinkletoes: "At least I was drunk! What's your excuse?"

Smokes is attempting to PEACEFULLY enter some ganger territory. The gangers who stop her at the entrance to the territory aren't too excited to see her.

GM (as ganger): "Who're you?"

Smokes: "Name is Smokes. And no, I'm NOT a cop."

GM (as ganger): "That sounds like something a cop WOULD say."

Smokes: "I used to be... but that was about 5 years ago."

GM (as ganger): "Hmm....."

Smokes is talking to Feral about the merits of taking on a gang. Feral isn't too excited about the prospect.

GM (as Feral): "I certainly wouldn't want to fight them by myself. I'd guess they have.... about 100 people based on the amount of territory they control?"

Smokes: "Ugh... I suppose I could always try the thing Spinner suggested and"

*Smokes makes massive air quotes*
Smokes: "talk to them"

GM (as Feral): "Yes... you should try that!"

Smokes, at midnight, has called her ganger friend to try convince him to get her into another gang's territory. Spinner unwillingly answers.

GM (As Spinner): "Why did you have to call at midnight?"
Smokes: "You know me, detectives don't sleep"

GM (As Spinner): "Are you aware that other people do? Do you also know that you can too?"
Smokes: "But this is important! If I don't get this I could die!"

GM (As Spinner): "I've only heard about these guys being violent towards Halloweeners like myself. Have you tried just talking to the people?"
Smokes: "I'll give it a try, but if I die, I'm coming back to haunt you!"

GM (as Spinner) "Can you at least haunt me during waking hours?"
Smokes: "No!"

Throughout the negotiations with the new Johnson, Twinkletoes asks several questions. Looking over the intel at the end, he has a startling conclusion.

Twinkletoes (OC): "So far, we have the following information on the missing person. His home address, his work address, his commlink number, his friend's name (the Johnson), the Johnson's work address, and the Johnson's commlink number. I could probably ask for the Johnson's address and get it too...."

Twinkletoes has heard that a new Johnson is looking for a job. When he shows up, the Johnson is VERY new and nervous. Twinkletoes walks up to the table, introduces himself, places his credstick on the table, and glances at it significantly.

GM (as Johnson): "Oh... um.... I'm new to this, how much does this usually run?"

*Without missing a beat, Twinkletoes spits out some nonsense.*

Twinkletoes (IC): "It runs 150¥ for the initial consultation. Accepting the actual job does, of course, run more."

*The Johnson immediately slots his credstick and pays up*

There's been a break in, and Smokes needs a decker. Lacking her usual adorable, annoying decker (Doe), she turns to a backup decker.


Smokes (OC): "I think I need to call Decrypt. He's a reasonably skilled, but not very professional."

GM (OC): "What? Decrypt? Not professional? How could you?!"

Smokes (OC): "I'll never tell him that to his face though. Can't have him know that I think he's skilled..."

Twinkletoes has an odd way of kidnapping people. The target was panicked, and Twinkletoes was very reassuring. The target was told several times that he was safe and that no one had any ill will towards him. Twinkletoes even gave him some bottled water to keep him comfy.


Smokes (OC): "You've gotta be the kindest kidnapper ever."

Twinkletoes (OC): "Just because I'm kidnapping someone against their will doesn't mean I have to be a dick about it."

Twinkletoes applies for a job for the city sanitation department.


GM (As manager): "You ever worked trash before?"
Twinkletoes (IC): "I've watched trash, but that's an entirely different story."
GM (As manager): "Sounds like you're probably qualified then!"

Twinkletoes is talking to his friendly decker about needing to restock his grenade stash.


Twinkletoes (IC): "I need to finish this job, get paid, and restock on my gaseous oblong thingies."

GM (as Decrypt): "Stuffer shack beans?"

Twinkletoes (IC): "If I could weaponize those, I'd be unstoppable."

GM (as Decrypt): "Yeah, there's a reason we don't eat there anymore."

Smokes is arranging a meeting with a detective who has been stalking her. Since she's a bit worried, she's hiring one of her orc friends to be a lookout. They finally settle on 1000Y for the lookout duties for the evening.


GM (as Spinner): "Oh yeah... time to get one of those new trid games!"

Smokes (IC): "My fixer actually has me playing one of those."

GM (as Spinner): "That new one? With the dragons?"

Smokes (IC): "Dragonfall? Yeah"

GM (as Spinner): "I don't know how historical it is, but it's a fantastic game..."

Twinkletoes (OC): "Is this what's known as 'metagaming'?"

Twinkletoes has been buying beer by the keg for a dwarf that saved his life. The dwarf has recently put in a good word with a landlord so Twinkletoes can get a new house. In return, Twinkletoes wants to return the favor with somre more mead.

Twinkletoes (IC): "I'll probably be putting in another order for some mead here soon. Aero has been quite nice to me."

GM (As Phil): "With how much you're buying, I'll have to give you a bulk discount."

Twinkletoes (IC): "Yeah... the guy is a dwarf, but somehow he gives me a run for my money when it comes to drinking contests. I don't know where they put the alcohol."

GM (As Phil): "I think it goes to their beards."

Smokes has recently found out that she has a stalker. In the meantime, Twinkletoes, who has just found a place to live far away from people who want to kill him, has been celebrating with one of his friends using copious amounts of mead.

Smokes (IC): "What does this guy want from me? This file has too much information on me."
Smokes (OC): "I'm going to give twinkletoes a call and talk about this"

Twinkletoes (IC): "You have reached the toes of the twink... er... twinkly toes...er... twinkletoes."
Smokes (IC): "What the... Are you ok??"

*The players lost it at this point and the game had to pause while everyone recovered from laughter*

The GM and Twinkletoes are looking over the rules about grenades after Twinkletoes' recent run-in with a Humanis Policlub group. The GM mentions the grenade throwing range table.

Twinkletoes (OC): "Wait a minute... there's a specific table for grenades? I thought that was all tied back to the weapon range table"

GM: "Oh yeah, take a look on page 119."

*Twinkletoes takes a quick look*

Twinkletoes (OC): "Oh wow, that would have really changed things if I'd know this. Based on this table, I can throw further than a grenade launcher... and more accurately too!"

GM: "Well... we did already know that he could throw some guns further than he could shoot them."

Twinkletoes (OC): "I mean, yeah... but I like this better!"

Arriving to Twinkletoes' former home, Smokes takes a quick look around. Signs of a battle greet her eyes. Spent gas grenade canisters and gun shell casings litter the ground. Just down the street, a memorial is being erected at the Humanis Policlub meeting center.

Smokes(IC): "Oh, Twinkletoes, what did you do??"

Twinkletoes (OC): "Oh, the racism is starting a bit early today, isn't it? You think I did this??"

Twinkletoes, having recently been gassed by his own gas grenade, is somewhat befuddled.

Twinkletoes (OC): "Let's see if twinkletoes remembers whether or not some Humanis Policlub members saw him leave home..."
*Rolls dice, gets no hits*

Twinkletoes (OC): "Welp, Twinkletoes heads home to regroup."
GM (OC): "Oh no... I didn't plan for this happening yet. Here we go: Twinkletoes walks home. As he nears the sewer grate, someone shouts."
GM (IC, as someone): "There he is, Get 'em boys!"

GM (OC): "Will Twinkletoes survive? Find out next time on Shadowrun!"

Smokes walks into a mostly empty receptionist room, pulls her tazer out, and proceedes to miss the secretary at point blank range. She fires again.

Smokes: "I'm throwing my combat pool into this!"
GM: "...Yeah.... your combat pool. Against a single UNARMED secretary."
Smokes: "Yep!"

After realizing that Twinkletoes is a bit smarter than he looks (and acts), Smokes is somewhat unsure what to make of him.

Smokes (OC): "I don't like this troll! He's not very troll like."
GM (OC): "That's a very racist thing to say."
Smokes (OC): "It's not racist, it's twinkletoes-ist! It's not racist if it's just one troll!"

Twinkletoes and Smokes meet for the first time. After accidentally sitting on the stealth troll, Smokes is a little bit miffed.

Twinkletoes: "Wow, you're getting friendly."
Smokes: "What the... how did... Trolls are supposed to be easy to see!"
Twinkletoes: "It's usually better if people don't see us. They're not very friendly."
Smokes: "I'd ask if you're mocking me, but I don't think even you know!"