Doe, having done so before, pulls up to Felhaven's bar and grill with his boat. He sees a new sign out front that reads "No boats allowed". He drives home, parks the boat, and drives back.

Doe (OC): "I walk inside to the bartender and let him know I wish to file a complaint."
GM: "The bartender directs you to a table that has a large troll at it"
GM (as bartender): "Take it up with the complaints department"
Doe (OC): "I walk up to the troll."

Doe: "Excuse me, I noticed that boats are no longer permitted here. Why is that? I was able to park perfectly last time."
GM (As troll): "Boat. Too. Big."
*Doe looks the troll up and down. And then further up.*
Doe: "I see..."

Doe, having arrived early for a meet, takes a moment to look around the area. The person he's meeting hasn't arrived yet, and there's a car in the lot that he's seen following him. Doe checks to see how much time he has left.

Doe (OC): "In milliseconds, Doe checks the time to see just how much time he has until the meet is supposed to happen."

The GM sighs and does some math

GM: "You have 1,927,536 milliseconds until the meet is supposed to happen. You showed up just a little early."

Doe (OC): "Excellent, I'm going to drive around for 15 minutes and see if I can figure out why I'm being followed."

Doe, needing a REALLY GOOD credstick, heads out to strike a deal for the credstick with a guy calling himself "Alias". Doe currently has 13,000 nuyen to his name, and the GM forgot that Doe likes to spend money. After exchanging pleasantries and going over what's required, Alias jumps to talking Nuyen.

GM (As Alias): "Fantastic, something tells me I am gonna enjoy working with you! All that's left is matter of payment, for this job standard rate is 100,000. Half up front, the other half on completion."

Doe: "Standard fare and method of doing business. Give me a moment to talk to my accountant, I need to divert some funds from another venture to get the half up front for you. The credsticks I'm carrying on me are sadly limited."

Alias: "No worries, in fact your partner out there, Foxtrot, already has my info, have her get the money to me, I'll start the second the money is in my account."


*Alias stands up, shakes Doe's hand, and departs.*


GM: Ok, I'm surprised you didn't try to negotiate him down a little.

Doe (OC): Look, you're dealing with Doe. Why did you expect negotiations when it comes to money?

GM: "...You're right, I don't know what I was thinking."

Doe, seeing the target exit the building that has been lit on fire, alerts Smokes that the job isn't done.

Doe: "I have eyes on the target, he just exited the building. I'm going to reassemble my sniper rifle now, unless you want to get him first. He's a dwarf."
Smokes: "Dwarf? Hell yeah! That's all I needed to know."

Smokes, having summoned groot, gestures towards the case of molotov cocktails.

Smokes: "I need you to take these to the building over there, place them behind the building by those pipes, and then leave."
GM: "It looks at you, looks at the flaming molotov, looks at you again, looks at the flaming molotov...."
GM: "I am groot?"
GM: "It takes off running towards the building."

Smokes is summoning a forest spirit to carry some things on fire.

GM: "You finish summoning your spirit, which takes the form of a sapling. You see the branches bend towards you, leaves rustling, and small voice issues forth from it."
GM: "I am groot"

Smokes: "I SUMMONED GROOT??"

Doe calls smokes.

Doe: "Smokes, I have a terrible idea. Are you in?"
Smokees: "Er... maybe?"
Doe: "It involves fire!"

*5 minutes later after smokes summons a tree spirit*

Smokes: "You know, I'm having a terrible idea...."
Doe: "Does it also involve fire?"
Smokes: "Maybe..."

Doe is trying to figure out how to weaponize "his" waterworks facility. The GM, trying to help, starts looking over Doe's character sheet and then bursts out laughing.

Doe: "Let me guess, you saw the Cyber-Schlong knowledge skill?"
GM: "Yep. I forgot I told you to add that one in."
Doe: "I also have it as an active skill. Gotta know enough to use it afterall."
GM: "Unfortunately, that doesn't really help in your situation. If anything, that one somehow makes the situation worse."

Doe has been MIA for several months now. Smokes has been worried sick about him. He returns out of the blue.

Doe: "Hey Smokes! I'm back! I'm bored! Let's go make some money."
Smokes: "Doe? Where the hell are you? Where have you been? Don't move!"
Doe: "At the business. We need a job... what should we do?"
Smokes: "I'm on my way over now. Don't move!"
Doe: "Hmm... maybe rob a bank?"
Smokes: "No! Stay put!"

Krieger is going to do some research on spells. He's tired of always having to kill everyone and has decided to find something less lethal.

Krieger (OC): "I would know that stunbolt is a thing. I mean, I've seen someone use it on Applejack. I've had people try use it on me. I've even seen a cat use it! I know the spell exists!"

Zerk is being targeted by a guy wielding a Ceska Scorpion. The guy lets off a burst fire shot and the GM goes to check the damage code.

GM (disappointedly): "Hmm... Apparently the Ceska is only 6L. I thought it was more than that. Maybe I should tweak this to make it more deadly..."
Everyone at once: "No!"
GM: "Aw, come on! Those are my guys you're killing!"

As Zerk, Krieger, and Strange Fellow forge ahead, Applejack is outside with a mage. Suddenly the GM asks a question that makes Applejack panic.

GM: "For no particular reason, what's your willpower?"
Applejack (OC): "Wait, what? Why? It's 5."
GM: "Alright, in that case, you're taking a severe, force 5 stunbolt. He gets 5 hits."
Applejack (OC): "GAH!"

Applejack slammed on the brakes to wake up Strange Fellow. He accidentally ripped off the glove compartment door as he woke up. He attempts to fix it as Applejack protests.

Strange Fellow: "There, I fixed it"
GM: "The door falls back off"
Applejack: "No you didn't!"

Strange Fellow is meeting Zerk.

Applejack: "Now Zerk, before you start lecturing me about picking up random people off the street, this is Strange Fellow."
Strange Fellow: "Point 1: My name is Strange Fellow. Point two: I don't know who you are. Point 3: I don't care. Want a soydog?"
Strange Fellow (OC): "I offer Zerk a soydog"
Zerk: "I like you already"

Applejack and Krieger need to pick up Strange Fellow as they're on the way to see Sleaze.

Applejack (OC): "I pull up outside Strange Fellow's alley way."
Applejack: "Hey strange fella, you want to go for a ride?"
Strange Fellow: "Oh dear.... not the metal box that contains friends."
Strange Fellow (OC): "Strange Fellow enters the truck, growling at the door as he does so."

Grandmaster, happy with the results of the exploded humanis policlub meeting location, asks the following of Lead Belt.

GM (Grandmaster): "So, in your professional opinion, how long before we can move in? I know you used some pretty crazy chemicals there."
Lead Belt: "Five days. Don't drink the water for two weeks. After that, make sure you don't eat the asphalt."
GM (Grandmaster): "What??"
Lead Belt: "Mr. Twinkletoes has a habit of eating anything smaller than him that crosses his path and doesn't say no."
GM (Grandmaster): "Oh... good to know. I'll make sure my men don't lick the floor."

Smokes, having picked up some explosives and requisite detonators, comes out and asks a question.

Smokes: "Alright, who is ready to blow up a building?"
GM (Jack): "ooh, ooh, ooh... me!"
Smokes: "I like your enthusiasm! What's your name?"
GM (Jack): "Jack!"
Smokes: "I'll keep you in mind when we report on this to you gang leader"
GM (Jack): "Awesome!!!"
*quietly*
GM (Jack): "Humanis go booooom!"

Smokes, talking with an ork who is simply known as "grandmaster" due to his martial prowess, lets slip that she doesn't like dwarves. Grandmaster decides to have some fun.

Smokes: "Yeah... so long as I never see Arnold Kemp again. I hate him."
GM (Grandmaster): "Let me guess... he's a dwarf."
Smokes: "Well, yeah, but that's not the only reason I hate him."
GM (Grandmaster): "I know, dwarfs, right? So much deviousness in such a small package."
Smokes: "See? Why doesn't any one else understand??"

*Grandmaster gives Smokes a long stare*

GM (Grandmaster): "You realize I'm messing with you, right?"

The group is currently meeting with a gang leader who is eying Twinkletoes VERY intently.

Twinkletoes: "Twinkletoes smiles... as innocently as possible"
GM (OC): "Yeah. Innocently. With all the tusks and confusing orthodontic hazards that Twinkletoes has in his mouth."
Twinkletoes (OC): "Damn, Twinkletoes needs braces"
Lead Belt (OC): "Nah, that wouldn't work... He'd eat them."

Krieger hands Strange Fellow a neurostun grenade.

Strange Fellow: "You're going to give me a grenade? I mean, there are stupid ideas, and then there is this."
Applejack: "What, do you have a better plan?"
Strange Fellow: "...no. I do not."