Zerk decides to break through a wall to get to the objective faster. As he does, he decides to shout out a bastardized catchphrase.


Zerk, breaking through a wall: "Have no fear, for Oh YEAH, I am here!"

Piece was just talking to the ugliest elf she'd ever seen. He was acting all suspicious like, and creepily mentioned he'd see her around.


Piece: "Hey Zerk, watch out for an ugly, bald elf!"

Zerk: "There's such a thing as elves that AREN'T ugly?"

Zerk thinks for a moment

Zerk: "Wait wait... I'll be joining the gender neutral collective, I need to start showing some care in how I speak about other metahumans.

The GM is giving an impassioned speech by a Universal Brotherhood zealot to Zerk.


GM (As UB zelot): "The Universal brotherhood is a family encompassing ALL metahumans, sexes, and sexualities. We all strive to be the very best we can to live more..."

Zerk cuts him off

Zerk: "Excuse me, If it encompasses all genders, sexes, sexualities, why is it the brotherhood? shouldn't it be the gender-neutral collective?"

Zerk is walking with some Halloweeners who are leading him to their boss. Getting closer to the hideout, there are some artistic piles of trash laying around here. The person leading points out several that he made.


GM (As ganger): "You see that one? I made it. The juxtaposition of the nerps wrappers and the soykaf cups had to be balanced just right on the forks."

Zerk: "Your medium reflects you as an artist."

The GM starts off the narration to the campaign detailing how a guy who died is dialing for revenge from beyond the grave. Eventually, the reason for contacting Zerk specifically comes up.


GM (As Sam): "I made a list of everyone who would care, and you were at the top of the list!"

Zerk: "Must be a short list!"

GM (As Sam): "You were also the only one on the list."

The GM was planning some encounters and trying to keep the danger level from spiraling out of control.


GM: "I think I'll just grab all of the strongest weapons I can find and make these their weapons"

Piece: "Are you hoping to kill us??"

GM: "Well... not hoping to. That's not the word. No, you're right, that IS the word."

After needing to drop of an Aztech scientist to her (probably) certain demise, Piece was feeling a little blue. The GM and Zerk needed to explain to Piece how good and evil works in Shadowrun.


GM: "Other systems like DND have a nice alignment chart of good, evil, lawful, good, etc. Shadowrun has evil and shades of grey."

Zerk: "There's puppy stomping evil, and then there's actual evil"

Piece: "Please don't make me don't me do any puppy stomping evil"

GM: "So.... kitten stomping is ok?"

Piece: "...I hate you!"

The players might have kinda sorta caused an incident at a Shiawase location, and needed some backup. They contact their fixer and see if anyone is around who is equipped to handle plan Z (AKA: Walk in the front door and shoot everything)



GM: "Your fixer let you know that there was a guy waiting at Grillby's if you needed additional help."



Piece: "We go to pick him up!"



Zerk: "Knowing that I'm looking for someone who's equipped to handle plan Z, I walk in and look for the ugliest mother-fucker here"



GM: "You find him"

Zerk has just been confronted by a guard about his desire to enter an authorized area.

Guard: "Sir, let me see your badge."

*Zerk hands over the id badge of a guard he killed just outside the door*

Zerk: "Here you go."

Guard: "Sir, this is Timmy's badge, Timmy's dead!"

Zerk: "Yes he is, and with his dying breath he told me that he wanted me to have that badge. Timmy gave his life to protect mine and all I have now to remember him by is that badge"

*A single Troll tear falls down Zerk's cheek*

Guard: "Sir, you need to leave."

Piece is a bit new to Shadowrun. The GM and Zerk try to explain how planning is done and plans executed.


GM: "There are a lot of plans that you can go with in Shadowrun. There's plan A where you try to sneak in, plan B where you try talk your way in, plan C where you try to hack the cameras.... and there's plans all the way down to plan Z: Walk in the front door and shoot everything."

Zerk: "Most Shadowrunners skip plans A through Y and go straight to plan Z."

Piece: "Well there's gotta be a better way to get inside. What's your plan?"

Zerk: "Well, I have a few ideas... but they all involve plan Z...."

After receiving the lowdown for their first job from a Johnson, Piece and Zerk go to confer in a corner.



Piece: "This guy doesn't sit well with me."

Zerk: "He's a Johnson... If he doesn't rub you the wrong way, he's not doing his job right."

During the time that the GM was trying to wrap his head around how magic works in Shadowrun, he had several gangers attack a stuffer shack while the players were in there. When all but the last enemy has fallen, Rocin bows towards the final ganger next to him, pulls back his sword, and says



Rocin: "Omae wa mou shindeiru"

GM (As ganger): "NANI??"



Rocin then added in his full combat pool to the attack and got 11 successes. The ganger rolls to resist and gets decapitated when the rolls showed all 1's.

The GM has decided to learn SR3E. As part of this, he did a simple encounter that involved magic. During this short encounter, Rocin sparked up a conversation with a home invading troll.


Rocin: "So... you're a Halloweener?"

GM (as troll): "I was, but they kicked me out when I caused trouble with the yaks"

Rocin: "That's just like them... they treat you well until you cause trouble. Then they throw you out."

GM (as troll): "Just like me dear old mum" *sniffs*

Rocin: "That's us trolls, we have a face that not even a mother could love. Now then, you boys need to move along, and no more robbing people! Or I'm going to have to murder you."

*Rolls intimidation*

GM (as troll): "You sound just like me dear old dad... he used to threaten me every night. Just before I went to bed."

*Sniffs*

GM (as troll): "Yes sir."

So... the GM decided that it was time to learn a little Shadowrun 3E, and he ran a random combat night. During this combat, the players, as always, took a few hits.

Rocin: "You mildly dented my shield!"
Tana: "You tore some threads out of my jacket!"

Rocin proceeded to inflict deadly damage with a moderate damage weapon while Tana killing hands a mofo in the face.

After an infiltration where the team dressed up as power employees, bluffed their way through the building, and ended up in a fight with some blood mages, the crew now needs to escape. This entire time, Lazarus has been raving in a barely coherent Scottish/Irish accent about the generators. They come around a corner and meet some guards:

GM (as guards, taking in blood soaked party): "We heard gunshots, what happened?"
Lazarus (IC): "The building loses power for 5 minutes and you bloody imbeciles start sacrificing people to your bloody blood gods!"
Slade (IC): "It's messy back there"
Lazarus (IC): "Did you know that they have a fucking blood powered generator? What's with all the blood? It's just a little power outage!"

Inside an Aztechnology complex, Slade looks around in the astral for any signs of magic and awakened. The air is thick and hazy with residual magic.

Lazarus (IC): "Any awakened? Any magic?"
Slade (IC): "Well, if magic was BO, this place would really stink"

Blue needs to cut power to a large Aztechnology complex. After she finds out where the cables are running from and what power distribution center is being used:

Blue (IC): "Ok, first thing we need to do is cut power to the building. That happens here."
Slade (IC, pulls out swords): "I got this!"
Blue (IC): "...He'll never make it back alive"

Upon completion of the mission, Wheels makes a snap decision to buy a remote controlled human. The human was the fixer's barkeep for a while and was being forced to work due to a persona chip. Wheels then realizes that he, as a rigger, might have something that he can do with this...

Wheels (OC): "Did I just buy a human that I can jack into to??"
Wheels Sends a text to Blue:

Wheels (IC): "Lolz. Just bought a person."
Blue (IC): "Lol, just one?"
Wheels (IC): "For now"

A very angry wendigo, having falled out of the van, lost it's concentration and became perfectly visible again. Wheels circles around once more to try pick up Pax and get out of there.

Wheels (IC): "Get in the van!"
Pax (OC): "Do I see the wendigo?"
GM (OC): "You do."
Pax (OC): "I punch him!"
Wheels (IC, as pax runs off): "NO!! We were so close to escaping!!"

A very angry, invisible wendigo jumps in the back of Wheel's van before Pax is able to board. Because Wheels is jumped in to the van through his control rig, he notices the wendigo enter. Pax immediately asked:

Pax (OC): "How does the wendigo FEEL inside you?"
Wheels (OC): "Large, furry, and uncomfortable. Not to mention, lots of pent up anger."