#174: "Upgrades"


(1)
After thoroughly having fun throwing things for the evening, Twinkletoes decides to upgrade.
Twinkletoes: "I'm going to pick up this person's ingram valiant. I make sure to take out all of the bullets though. I want to throw this at people later."
GM (sighing): "Fine. you do that."
Twinkletoes: "I'm also going to take the bullets with me. They're useful... I can throw them later!"
#173: Troll Bows


(1)
Twinkletoes has just made an important discovery.
Twinkletoes (OC): "I just realized that I can throw my arrows and do more damage than my bow does. The bow can just shoot it further."
Decrypt (OC): "Why? Shouldn't you have bought the bow at max when you did character creation?"
Twinkletoes (OC): "I did.... this is as strong of a bow as I can get legally at character gen"
Decrypt (OC): "At what point are you just shooting ballistica arrows?"
#172: Guns n' Ammo


(1)
Twinkletoes and Decrypt have been ambushed by two street samurai who are refusing to back down.
Twinkletoes (OC): "I want to chuck my gun at him"
GM (OC): "What? That's a terrible idea! And if it's loaded, then I have to roll and figure out if it goes off, and which way it fires, and..."
Twinkletoes (OC): "No, it has no bullets. I have a gun with no bullets. I just keep it around to throw at people. I can throw it further than I can shoot it, and more accurately too."
GM (OC): "What?"
Twinkletoes (OC): "Yeah, I don't even have a gun skill or any bullets."
GM (OC): "Fine... go ahead..."
#171: Summon stoppers


(1)
Swarm and Vandal have shown up to a summoning ritual taking place on the court house's front lawn. Swarm takes offense to this.
Swarm (IC): "Attention, this is knight errant security. This summoning has been deemed illegal. Please cease and desist immediately or additional force will be deemed necessary!"
GM (IC): "They shout back 'We're already done!"
Swarm (IC): "Put it back where you got it and we'll call it even!"
GM (As ghoul mages): "No!"
#170: I came in like a wrecking ball!


(2)
Vandal has just harpooned a guy from their attack-a-copter. The Harpoon cannon starts reeling the guy's body back in along with the harpoon.
Vandal (IC): "Woo! I love this thing!"
Swarm (IC): "Wait! Stop the winch... I want to use the body as a ghoul wrecking ball!"
#169: Armored Attack-A-Copter


(1)
Swarm and Vandal have received authorization to use a helicopter. They proceed to load the entirety of the armory onto the helicopter.
GM: "Mr. Ahuja just watches you carry everything onto the helicopter with a raised eye brow, but he doesn't say anything."
Swarm (OC): "I like how last time he asked if wanted anything from the armory, and we took nothing. This time we're taking the entire armory."
#168: Recollections Fade


(1)
Doe, Smokes, and some other runners have met peaceably around a table in a nice restaurant. They get to talking about some missing research that the team has when Smokes chimes in.
Blitz (IC): "So, we've managed to decrypt some of the data, but it looks like there's some that's missing."
Smokes (IC): "Wait, remind me what this was again? I've died since then."
#167: The Best of Plans


(1)
Doe and Smokes are talking with a group of runners about the best way to get into a heavily fortified Ares facility.
Doe (IC): "Maybe they give tours? I'll give them a call"
GM (As Blitz): "What? They're not going to give out tours!"
Doe (IC): "You'd be surprised how many places do."
Smokes (OC): "I nod vigorously"
Doe (IC): "Check out the new owner of the water treatment facility sometime. You might be surprised?"
GM (Blitz): "Oh, yeah, that place was attacked by a water elemental a while back, right?"
Doe (IC): "Right. A 'water elemental'. That's what it was. I had NOTHING to do with that."
#166: Drone Defenses


(0)
Swarm has stationed 2 heavily-armed roto-drones with orders to "shoot anything that comes out of the back door". As they wrap up with the enemies, his companion goes to leave through the door.
GM (OC): "Question for you... how likely is it that Swarm would have rescinded the command on the drones?"
Swarm (OC): "Oh shit! I rescind the command to shoot anything coming out the door."
GM (OC): "I'll allow it this time."
#165: Graceful Troll Jokes


(2)
Twinkletoes has stealthed into a meeting with the Johnson in order to play a practical joke. The Johnson didn't scream when he noticed the troll sitting next to him suddenly. When they finish talking, Twinkletoes decided to head out in style.
Twinkletoes: "I sneak out of the room"
*Twinkletoes rolls a decent stealth open test*
GM: "The Johnson lets out a scream when he realizes you vanished."
Decrypt (OC): "I walk into the room laughing at the Johnson."
Decrypt (IC): "Ha! That was great, you should have seen... wait... where did he go? Twinkletoes, get your ass back in here!"
Twinkletoes (OC): "I walk back into the room, laughing."
Twinkletoes (IC): "Hahaha, that was great. You should have seen the look on my face. But wait, you couldn't because you couldn't see me!"
#164: Street Troll


(1)
Murder spree finished, Decrypt and Twinkletoes head home for the evening.
Decrypt: "Alright, I'll drop you off at home. Where do you live?"
Twinkletoes: "I live on a street corner in the barrens. Not too bad a life. Lets me hide from the gangers trying to find me."
Decrypt: "You know what, let's change that. We'll find you a nice place. Well, a decent place. Ok, ok, maybe at least better than street life. Probably somewhere exceedingly mediocre."
Twinkletoes: "Ok. I'll do so tomorrow... I gotta pack up my stuff. Get it out of the sewer grate and all that."
#163: Revenge is served


(1)
Decrypt and Twinkletoes have just broken into the guy's house who killed the guy they were going to kill. Twinkletoes "stealthily" breaks down the door.
Decrypt (OC): "As the door breaks down, I look at this guy. Is he the guy who shot the gaurd?"
GM: "Yes."
Decrypt (IC): "The guard sends his regards!"
Decrypt (OC): "I shoot him with my shotgun."
#162: Troll Haiku


(1)
Twinkletoes and Decrypt have tracked down the creeper from last session. He's just as creepy as in person as over the email and doesn't seem to understand that the lady he loves isn't into him.
Twinkletoes: "We should send him a message in haiku format from her. Here's what it could say."
I really hate you.
I really really hate you.
Just leave me alone.
GM: "You know, that is pure poetry."
Decrypt: "Yeah, ya know what? I spoof a message from his lady friend in haiku format."
#161: Edible Items


(1)
Twinkletoes, unwilling to let the conversation about eating dinnerware die out, tries to justify his position.
Twinkletoes: "They're smaller than I am... therefore they're food, right?"
Decrypt: "Twinkletoes, look at me. I'm smaller than you. I. Am. Not. Food."
Twinkletoes (Sadly): "Oh."
#160: Dinner Party


(1)
Decrypt has decided to show up uninvited at the dinner he set up for the secretary.
Decrypt (IC): "So Twinkletoes, want to get some good food after this?"
Twinkletoes (IC): "Restaurant food is good... almost as good as the plates they serve it with."
Decrypt (IC): "What? You eat the plates?"
Twinkletoes (IC): "Why would they bring it out with the food if it wasn't food? I sometimes make a plate sandwich. It's a little crunchy."
Decrypt (IC): "Don't you ever have a sharp pain in your mouth? Or in your stomach after you eat?"
Twinkletoes (IC): "No... why?"
Decrypt (IC): "Uh..... nevermind."
#159: Invasion of Privacy


(1)
Decrypt, using his hacking skills to invade a secretaries' privacy (Like any respectable decker would), finds an email from a suitor asking her to dinner at a fancy restaurant.
Decrypt (OC): "I send him an email saying "I would love to!" I also send what looks like an automated message confirming the reservation at "Dinner in the Sky" to the secretary."
GM: "You get a reply of 'NO!' from the secretary."
Decrypt (OC): "I send back another message that looks automated saying 'Reservation accepted'."
GM: "You get back 'NO!' again."
#158: Stealth Troll


(1)
Twinkletoes has started stealthing through a building. As he does so, he starts humming his own theme song to himself.
GM: "Wait, is he actually humming?"
Twinkletoes (OC): "You know... yeah, he is. Let's lower that open sneaking threshold by 3"
Twinkletoes (IC, humming): "Stealth troll... sneaking through a building... stealth troll... gonna take 'em down. Stealth troll... he can hide from all..."
#157: *Click!*


(0)
While the boys are fighting out front, Sugar Cane has snuck around to the back. She finds a locked door which she is unable to pick. However, after a quick glance around, she finds a security camera and decides to put her... skills to use.
Sugar Cane (OC): I'm going to glance at the camera and flash it!
GM: Roll your seduction
(Sugar Cane rolls high enough)
GM: You look at the camera, smile and open your shirt. All of a sudden you hear a click.
Slam (OC): The stripper ways come in handy, I see!
Everyone laughs.
#156: Why Won't You Die??


(1)
There was one guard who just would not die. He survived two fully automatic bursts from an assault rifle (dodged), two fully automatic bursts from an Ingram Valiant, three burst fire rounds from the same Ingram Valiant, and a long continuous burst of suppressive fire. He was finally taken out by an axe-wielding maniac.
GM: "As you cut off the arm, you see that the hand is clenched into a fist except the middle finger."
Slam: "Oh, screw you too dead guard"
#155: Deadly Runners


(0)
From his vantage point on the roof with a sniper rifle, Doe just watched Feral cave a person's face in and then leap over a barrier and tackle another guy. As that happened, he also saw Smokes get shot, throw her gun down, and geek a guy with a F6 Deadly magebolt.
Doe (OC): "Doe pulls out the tablet he picked up and starts to write a note."
Doe: "...do...not...piss...off..."
Doe (OC): "And I'll have to finish that on my next combat turn."